There is rarely a time when I’m not considering how to document precious moments both personal and for others. As the miles passed by I first considered how I was going to capture this trip – my phone, Polaroids, the behemoth that is my actual camera. These were all options. Secondly, I considered how blessed we are that we have an endless array of means to capture and hold what we regard dearest. I reflected on how the family portrait and snap shot may be one of the most iconic examples of disparity – something so interwoven into our identities from the moment we enter this world (literally) until the day we die. There is truly no level of poverty so great in the United states that someone would not have (or at least at one time have had) a photo of someone or something that they love. They are heirlooms, casual files that take up real estate on our phones, tiny framed masterpieces and huge works of art. They are sometimes quiet moments we keep tucked away and other times magazine ad worthy status symbols we erect. Yet, we don’t even think twice about the fact that there remain places in the world in which no one has ever, nor will ever own a photograph. The fact that we don’t think twice about this is a reminder of the general importance of pulling ourselves out from within, stepping outside of our immediate line of sight to gain a broader world view.

On my trek toward relaxation my mind went, as it often does, to Honduras; where my heart always finds its way. Many of the people in remote areas have never had a photograph of anyone they’ve ever loved and when loved ones pass on, it is only that fuzzy and careless thing we call memory that helps them recall the details. It was then that it occurred to me that I could change this. I could humbly offer this – the act of remembering. I could go. I could capture them and give them themselves, in that moment – now, (because now is all anyone has) for them to hold onto forever.

I had no idea how exactly I was going to bring a photograph to multiple, remote villages in Honduras with no internet, much less, electricity, but come on! In the age of “there’s an app for that” and 3D printers, honestly, I wasn’t too concerned. I mean, if there’s a self scooping cat litter box, there must be a way for me to produce a high quality printed photo instantaneously. Technology did not disappoint. Furthermore, you did not disappoint. Because of your love and support I arrived in San Pedro Sula, Honduras on January 7th 2017. I photographed one hundred families. I hope to go back next year and photograph hundreds more.*

In consideration for writing this piece I was searching for some profundity to share about this trip, about Honduras, the US, about poverty and disparity, and history, but really I feel that there’s nothing new to say on these topics. Though even if it’s not new, I know it’s still relevant. I just felt the best thing it could offer was what came to me as I spoke a couple weeks ago to a group of Girl Scouts about this trip. As I grappled for simplistic, but effective language to express the deeper concepts of disparity and philanthropy to a group of eight year olds, I offered that I was simply doing something that I loved in a way that was helpful and meaningful to others and that everyone “no matter how big or small” (thanks dr. Seuss) has the ability to find something that they love (also no matter how big or small) and offer some piece of that to people around them as an act of love and kindness. This is how we make the world a better place.

It’s also through our own gratitude that we make the world a better place. It is with gratitude that we building and maintain perspective in our lives. It is not that it is impossible (nor should it be) to have negative emotions when we have gratitude, because emotions are not mutually exclusive. However, it becomes more challenging to dwell in a negative space when we’re measuring by what we are grateful for instead of measuring by what is upsetting in our lives.

I mention basic gratitude because I think we too readily jump to pity and to projections of what it means to us to have joy, happiness and success when we’re talking about countries that are, well, not the United States and I’m here to tell you we do not have it figured out and we are not the measuring stick for abundant living simply because we have more and endless choices. Rather, we should cautiously and reverently respond when met with disparity with curiosity about what it means to be happy and healthy and successful to them, not us. Not all frame work is the same.

*A quick word on the serious demeanor of some of the families pictured above. I’ve received comments on how sad, angry, upset or simply unenthused those pictured seem. One consideration I’d like to challenge viewers to take into account is to remember that at the the turn of the century (the 20th century – not the 21st century you spring chickens out there), when photography was relatively new and just gaining steam, families did not smile. The family portrait was a solemn event that required reverence. This was the one chance to immortalize the precious family name. This was not a time for smiles and giggles. This experience was more a kin to sitting in church than a modern casual day on the beach. It was important to me that I not project our current interpretation of what a beautiful family photo means. I wanted them to simply present their most honest selves. So, I didn’t ask for smiles. Nor did I construct a scene that depicted jovial lighthearted families without a care in the world. The result were piercing accounts of fierce pride in mother’s eyes, genuine joy in a father’s embrace, legitimate exhaustion and the vast depth of the arc of the emotional spectrum that is an honest family on their most honest day of living – today, this day, the only day that is guaranteed.

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Upon taking these images I couldn’t tell you the difference between a sea lion and a seal. When I descended the steps into La Jolla cove, I was enamored by the wildlife, as I am by all wildlife. I was in awe of these creatures and appreciative to have the opportunity to coexist so closely.

Though, it was a bitter sweet encounter due to the vast number of visitors and their complete lack of empathy for another living creature’s personal space. I quickly became uncomfortable as I watched countless people approach a family of sea lions, hover inches away and even try to touch them. One aggressive bull spent his entire day herding his family into one adorable pile and then chasing tourists away and barking loudly. Most people laughed. I didn’t think it was funny. I sensed his level of anxiety and could not fathom why people didn’t draw the parallel that they themselves would be enraged if they were laying on the beach with their family and a constant parade of people came by, invading their personal space and trying to pet their children.

I thought the seal conservancy organization said it best, “Although harbor seals are protected by the Marine Mammal Protection Act, the reality is that many tourists unfortunately don’t understand the effect it can have on the seals when they engage in behaviors such as posing close to the hauled out seals for a selfie. Such seemingly innocuous actions can result in premature births, abandoned pups, and even pup mortality. The City’s Ranger does a wonderful job educating visitors about our seals, but he isn’t on-site 24 hours a day.” This sentiment could be echoed for any species of the family unit.

In researching to write this piece, I came to understand the complexities of the events surrounding the relatively recent emergence of these creatures at La Jolla Cove. What has transpired in recent history in San Diego is a classic dilemma of the relationship between human existence colliding with the natural world. According to several sources, the sea lions are viewed as a problem. The seals, who have long called these surrounding shores home for mating and birthing, are not viewed as a menace. The main difference being that sea lions are potentially more aggressive and have created a stench in the area that drives local business owners mad. It has been confirmed that the stench stems from the urine and feces that the sea lions generate from hauling out onto the cliffs where the ocean cannot quickly wash their excrement away. Seals, having smaller flippers, cannot climb the cliffs. Therefore their waste is washed away. According to KPBS Radio News the problem began when the city put up fences along the bluffs and cliffs which then invited the new guests to feel welcome without the presence of human interference.

It wasn’t long before these new visitors overstayed their welcome and many solutions were introduced, but thus far, to no avail it seems. It turns out that my frustration with the hoards of people blatantly disrespecting the personal space of these creatures was the result of one such solution. The theory being that to provide direct access to the sea lions by visitors would ultimately drive the sea lions away. Not a terrible theory, but they seem to be a more stubborn creature than we give them credit for.

I don’t want your take away from this piece to be, “Don’t visit La Jolla Cove. There are aggressive sea lions and it smells bad.” My experience was a rich one and the issues at hand are complicated and only a microcosm of a much larger issue concerning our constant struggle to coexist with the natural world. Go to La Jolla, to Childrens Beach and Casa Beach. Experience our clash with nature, but do it knowingly and respectfully. If you keep a respectful distance and simply coexist, then you will have no issue with these animals.

Don’t hover over a baby and somehow expect you won’t get bitten from an angry and stressed parent. Don’t cover your face and exclaim how terrible the stench is. Guess what, you go see wild animals, they typically defecate and it can smell. For the love of God, don’t feed them (are you kidding me people, do I really have to say this?) Honor the right of these animals to bask on the same shores you do without harassment. They have the right to enjoy the beautiful, pristinely blue waters, sandy shore line and dramatically stunning landscape as much as you and I. Go to La Jolla Cove and be respectful of the gift that nature has laid at your feet.

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